Sometimes there is just not enough meat to make a whole essay, but those pesky random thoughts tend to pile up on my mental plate of possibilities (wow, am I on an alliterative role or what!!) and I need to dish them out to make room for more.
While on the topic of food, sort of, why do people take pictures of and then post on FB, the plate of food they are about to eat? I find that weird. Do you say grace and then whip the phone or camera and shoot the soufflé? My grandmother would have come up over the table like Satan on a slingshot if we had done that.
Earrings…really really big dangly earrings. Those annoy me, especially if sitting next to them at a concert on other venue where the sound of wind chimes is not welcome. Every time a lady with chandelier earrings moves her head, I look around for the rest of the new wave band. Don’t those things ever get caught in your hair? The one time I watched a baby rip the pierced earring out of her mom’s ear, I vowed never to poke holes in my head.
Automobile inserts in the newspapers. Do I really need 8 or more pages with pictures of cars and tires and more cars to decide if I want a car and which one? The pictures are black and white. I only buy red cars. Stop cluttering up my newspaper although I suspect the extra paper is there to justify the cost and make me think I am getting some quality news.
Coupons. I know that there are real fanatics out there who live and die by coupons, they even have several reality shows about such things, but like the car inserts, cut it out! Why not sell a whole stack of coupon inserts in its own little packet which can be purchased separately? The ones in there now are smaller and fall out all over my table when I am trying to look for red cars.
The ATM....okay, we can put satellites past Jupiter and pick tiny items off the ocean floor, how come we can’t make the ATM stop asking me what language I want to use? One would think that after the same code number has selected the same language every time for however many years, the computer chip would be smart enough to recognize a trend. Does the bank think I am suddenly going to go rogue and want to proceed in French just to practice? And aren’t they being a bit limiting? My GPS will allow me to choose from about 30 languages and accents, maybe I want to do my banking in Swahili for once, just to see if I can do it.
People who think tights are just as good as pants. Guys, you may want to skip this one as I need to pass along some fashion facts. Ladies…..tights do not function like spanx (or as we used to call them, girdles). Don’t kid yourself, that body “shaper” is really just a girdle repackaged. Tights are for wearing under stuff instead of wearing panty hose. Dancers and acrobats and such wore tights so the muscles showed while keeping the legs warm, uniform and safely protected from chafing. A leotard went over the tights…leotards begin like tights for the torso. Leggings are about as close as one can come to wearing no pants if one insists. Leggings are just thicker tights but the rear view does not change much, the fabric still stretches (or in some cases, sstttrreeeetttchhhhessssssssss). I think the designers intended for a longer top or dress to go over the leggings. Notice the word is “leg”-ings which one would think that means the legs are the only part to be showing. If one still insists on going gaga…then yoga pants are now considered pants. I am guilty of wearing those on occasion although I have never done yoga. Yoga is too close to yogurt. (This must be my entrée paragraph.)
I have an inability to throw away pens. Think I can get my own reality show segment?
Okay….I made it to the bottom of the page. Perhaps I should go see a local art show and write about it.